My Morning On Twitter (Or "Tweeting the Day Away")

Fact: I am horrible at resting.

It's been quite a week trying to recover from Saturday's "I got a concussion falling in the shower" incident.  I have a constant headache which sometimes rages into high gear, I can't concentrate enough to read a book (I know, I can't believe it either), I pretty much hate television, and it was a huge disaster when I attempted to go back to work yesterday (I threw up, my headache exploded, and I got sent home and told to rest until I was well).

Just to reiterate, I'm horrible at resting.

So I figured I'd spend the morning on Twitter, since it's a social networking experience that I haven't used as much as Facebook.  I mean, I tweet sometimes (usually links to blog posts or retweets of cool things other people far wittier than I say), but I never really got immersed.

It's been an interesting (and yes, restful) morning.

First, if you're interested, you can find me here on Twitter (I suspect after this morning's experiment, I'll be spending more time there).  As long as you're not a crazy porn kind of thing, I'll follow you back.

So here are my specific observations, interactions, and such following a very eventful few hours ...  I'm setting it up as kind of a bulleted summary since, as mentioned before, I'm struggling with concentration.  I'm going to start at the beginning of my morning and just sort of share what happened.

* I started out by posting a link to my post yesterday, asking the provocative question, "Should Stephen King have shelved Rage?"   There were no retweets, although I think it's a very cool piece, arguably one of the best things I've written in recent months.  I was informed, however, that the post made it onto The Stephen King Daily.

* As I have an obsession with celebrities, I tend to follow a lot of them, just because it's interesting.  I keep hoping I'll get a personal response from a bona fide celeb one of these days, but no dice so far.  I added Jenna von Oy after reading about her new venture into blogging on People, leaving a comment: "So exciting! Blogging definitely opens a whole new world with tons of connections, help, and places to vent angst ;-) Welcome!"  


* I also attempted to interact with Alec Baldwin, his daughter Ireland, Sarah Silverman, Dara Torres, and Rose McGowan.  I figured it was worth a shot, although I definitely recognize that celebrities have more exciting things to do than Tweet with a high school English teacher from New Hampshire ;-)

* I had a really interesting exchange with DogWalkBlog beginning with his comment, "Time to figure out how to make a living without the Internet. Dependence on all this tech is stressing me the hell out."  I told him about my recent positive experience with the internet, and we had some cool banter about tech highs and lows and how pathetic it is to have "I fell in the shower" be an explanation for how one gets a concussion.  Oh, and the double entendres popping up all over Romeo and Juliet ;-)

* Some people are really cheerful in the morning, notably Melissa Foster, Sandi Krakowski, and Annie.

* Henry responded to my standard angry insomniatic rant something like, "The pain meds didn't help you call asleep?" (he's since deleted it, so I don't remember the exact quote). I, of course, responded, "Well, I could call, "Asleep! Asleep! Asleep!", but it didn't help me FALL asleep :-( Love your "just woke up" texts <3"


* I had a little back and forth with the very cool Simon Jadis about my "Cullenesque tendencies" since I'm hating sunlight these days.  He could relate ;-)


* Poor Conservative linked to an article talking about how Guantanomo detainees have a tendency to return to lives of terrorism when released.  I noted, "Kind of like American prisoners returning to the proverbial "life of crime"?"  I have an innate urge to antagonize political extremists, but I didn't get any sort of response.  I was kind of hoping for a debate on that one since my point is extremely valid ... c'est la vie.


*  I got some great random useless information from UberFacts, including
   - "If you type 'illuminati' backwards, followed by '.com' in your address bar, you end up at the U.S.    
     government's national security page."
   - "A whale's penis is called a "dork."”
   - "There are at least 100 chemical reactions taking place in our brains every second."
   - "There are 12 calories in a tablespoon of semen. Same as eating 4 Tic-Tacs."


* I complimented Frank Marcopolos on the title of his book, shared mine, and was informed by him that Unbreakable is the title of a Bruce Willis movie.  Dammit, back to the drawing board ...


* I figured I'd continue the theme of pieces I write that no one comments on by referencing my recent ZL piece on the Komen Foundation/Planned Parenthood debacle.  No response.  Still no comments, either ;-)


* Vive le Nerd and I had a fun exchange about the craziness of CAPTCHA.  I mean, type in "penus" or "foxsexppo" to prove you're not a robot?  Come on ...


* dLittle Prince gave out props to educators on Twitter, one of which was yours truly.  Very cool :-)


* I posted a link to a post I wrote some time ago asking for assistance with the novel I'm working on.  No response.  Clearly, people either ignore my links or I really suck ;-)


* I had some great political dialogue with Marshall Talk, mostly about the dichotomy between big businesses claiming the need for tax cuts and those of us regular folk just scraping by.  Really interesting conversation, actually ...


* Aspiring country musician Doug Briney was talking up his debut CD.  I Tweeted him that I'd try to check it out, and he sent me a Tweet back thanking me.  He was very polite and legitimate, so if you're a fan of country, definitely give him a listen :-)


* Dan Krokos tweeted, "My mom just sent me her first FW: email ever. It was a nice one about puppies but this is a slippery slope."  I replied that it reminded me of the first text message my mother ever sent: "howdoispace" (Dan tweeted me an LOL in response).

So I've talked kale with rightingteacher, toilet paper rolls with Selah, the double-edged sword nature of the internet with Ray Banks, and cameltoe with Jade Harley.  There were other small conversations, too, but I'm losing concentration here ;-)

I guess the bottom line is, Twitter is a lot of fun.  I find that, with Facebook, a lot of people know me in real life, so I tend to hold back saying things sometimes.  Interacting with complete strangers on Twitter was much freer.

So final conclusion after a few hours on Twitter?  Not a bad way to spend a morning.  

And I rested lots while in the midst of this fascinating experiment and study ... win/win :-)

I'm Sweet and Versatile ... and Full of Random Facts ;-)

I love receiving blog awards.  I really do.

I'm not always great about passing them along, mostly because it's so hard to choose from so many deserving blogs, but this one has the added bonus of allowing me to explore random facts about myself (which is something I enjoy doing, for some reason or another), plus Richard at Writing and Living by Richard P. Hughes is such a cool person that I just can't not go for it.  (Yes, I know that last sentence is an English teacher's nightmare ... heeheehee).

Plus, the timing is right on this once since tomorrow is my first day back at work and I never sleep the night before school starts up again, so this is as good a time as any to occupy my time (and better than reading this horrible chick lit book I'm in the midst of, which is horribly lame and predictable but I still want to know what happens, or watching NCIS reruns).

Also, there's the added privilege of this being a "two for one" blog award event ...

According to Richard, I'm deserving of these two titles:

And he also, in his wonderful post awarding these two very complimentary honors, referred to me as a survivor ... which is something I really needed to hear.

So, the deal is that I share seven random facts about myself then pass this dual award on to five deserving bloggers.

Seven Random Facts About Me
1.  I get skeeved out by really weird things.
Like everyone, I have some odd fears (snakes, thunderstorms, airplanes, feet), but every once in awhile I'll get completely freaked out for odd random reasons.

A few weeks ago, my dog Sonja's invisible fence collar stopped working, so I had to walk her on a leash.  I happened to be in the middle of reading 'Salem's Lot by Stephen King, which is about vampires.  I've read the book probably twenty times and it's never once scared me, but while I was out there in the dark by myself, I got totally freaked.

Then tonight, when I got home, I was walking up the brick path to my house and a toad hopped out in front of me.  Now, I'm not scared of toads at all, but the suddenness (and the fact that I almost stepped on the poor thing), completely threw me for a loop.

2. I am an excellent teacher and 100% comfortable talking to classes of 25-30 kids, but I stutter and sound like a rambling idiot when I try to speak in front of adults.
I hear this is a fairly common problem, actually, but it still bothers me.

Most interesting, though?  How my students react after an adult has come into my classroom.

"Why were you stuttering?  Are you afraid of him?  No offense, but you sounded like a moron.  You turned magenta when you said the word 'balls', and we weren't even going to laugh until you started to."

It does lead to some good discussions on how teachers are human, too, that we have weaknesses and fears and stressors and so on.

3. I have become something of a Tweetaholic.
I started using Twitter in earnest as a writing tool, actually.

If you read my blog with any regularity (and if you're at this point in my "list" of seven random facts), you'll note that I have a tendency to go on.  And on.  And on.

I have never been a concise writer, despite the many accolades I've received, and I realized this summer while rereading my finished novel that this little issue of mine might be part of why I'm still unpublished.

So Twitter, which holds me back with a character count limit, has forced me to just spit it out.  Simply.  It's been invaluable, all joking aside.

And that simple, tell-it-like-it-is mentality has allowed me to share and explore my pathetic short story repertoire and recognize this as an area in need of work.

4. I can't cook.
I don't know if I've ever mentioned this on here, but I cannot cook.  I've completely ruined macaroni and cheese out of the box, set oatmeal on fire in the microwave, and destroyed a pan boiling water ... and those are the ones I'll admit to publicly.

I have many other skills (I can do a split, tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue, write about any topic, and so on), but it's very interesting to me that a skill that pretty much any fifth or sixth grader can do is beyond me.

5. Motherhood is my greatest adventure.
My kids crack me up.  In fact, sometimes I wonder how I ever laughed before my daughters were born.

I am incredibly proud of both Addie and Belle, and I would not change either one of them for anything.  They are beautiful, brilliant girls with their own thoughts and ideas; they are polite and respectful (well, at least in public); and, just to emphasize the point, they are freaking hilarious.

If you are my friend on Facebook, you know ...

I also have to note that becoming an aunt to my two nephews is also an unspeakable, enjoyable treat.

6. Sometimes I find it hard to solve a problem, then a very obvious answer will appear as if from a bolt of lightning.
*  I couldn't figure out how to charge my old iPod Nano (which, although it's been replaced by an iPod Touch, still contains 3,000 of my favorite songs that I can't access on an account which I paid for ... it's kind of a long story).  I'd been using a speaker dock as a charger, but I accidentally dropped it, and it's for some reason stopped charging.

It finally occurred to me that I could just plug it into my computer.  Success!

*  The mouse on my work computer sucks balls (actually, it still has a ball, which is the majority of the problem).  I sat there for an hour fighting with the stupid thing, then it occurred to me to put in a new mouse ball.

*  I can't think of any more examples off the top of my head, but I guess the gist is that I have a tendency to miss the obvious, then feel pretty cool because I figured it out ... before realizing that it wasn't exactly a difficult problem to solve.


7. I am so lonely sometimes.
Following the irreparable marriage dissolving into divorce, I enjoyed being single for a long time.  I really did.  I hadn't had random hook-ups like that since college, and it was pretty good for my ego.

After a really traumatic incident last spring which I will probably never write about on this blog since I can count on the fingers of one hand the people I have told and that it's something that hit me harder and more viscerally than rape, divorce, or anything else, I realized that the problem was bigger than I'd thought.

I am a kind person that loves to help other people.

I'm told that I'm smart and funny and have a great personality and so on.  I don't like myself enough to come up with a list of my own adjectives, but those are the ones I hear a lot.

I have the capacity to be pretty.  When I'm in gym-going mode and lay off the Barq's Root Beer and Milky Ways (and Big Macs, who the heck am I trying to kid?), I can look pretty good for my age.

(well, at least not totally disgusting ... lol)

I have a good, solid job and many enjoyable hobbies.

I am hygienic.

And yet men either want one thing from me, or they want to be friends.  I can't seem to find a situation where those two expectations are not mutually exclusive, and it's very frustrating, very daunting.    

It makes me wonder what the heck is wrong with me, why the occasional Friday night hook-ups (or Monday night hook-ups, as the most recent case may have been) are the only way to salve my damaged ego.

And yet I would give a great deal to be able to have "a real boyfriend", which sounds pretty ludicrous when you're 34 years old.

But it's true.  I get so depressed watching couples everywhere, hearing love songs, observing body language in a restaurant.

I know that patience is a virtue, but I'm not good with patience.  If anyone knows any nice single men in the New Hampshire/Massachusetts/Maine area, give them my e-mail ;-)

Okay, pity party over ... time to share the love I feel for five sweet, versatile bloggers that I enjoy ... and bear in mind that "sweet" and "versatile" can be taken a number of ways ;-)

1.  Half Past Kissin' Time

2.  Anything But Theist

3.  Just Another Blog

4.  Peaceful Reader

5.  The Frisky Virgin (who, I should note, also gave me an award ... and I'm working on that post :-))

I hope you check out these five amazing places in the blogosphere.  You will not regret it :-)

Hey : ) I Reached 100 Posts!

Well, 102 to be exact (counting this one, of course). So as a celebration of sorts, here is a list of useless/interesting(?)/(definitely)unique facts about me. Enjoy :)

And as soon as I have 100 followers (or 102, if I am to maintain my lack of with-it-ness which you've all come to know by now), I will have a most amazing contest. Plans are in the works : )

Okay, here we go ...

* I lived up to my klutzy image by falling on ice at work this past winter ... in front of six kids that, to their credit, made a great effort not to laugh.

* I think "NCIS" is the best show ever created.

* I wonder constantly what my students take away from my class.

* My self-esteem is in the negative digits.

* I am addicted to a gossip website that keeps me up to date on all things celebrity gossip, one of my minor obsessions.

* I have two tattoos, but I desperately regret both of them.

* I can analyze literature with the best of them (I actually understand and--gasp!--enjoy Shakespeare), but I have absolutely no common sense.

* When I was a kid, I wanted to be a journalist, a lawyer, a psychologist, or an author. "Teacher" wasn't even in the running.

* I am a very different person when you first meet me than I am when you get to know me.

* I hate the telephone. Like, I deplore it.

* I have no patience for close-minded people. I have strong opinions about various things, but I will always listen to the other side as long as it is intelligently presented and not based in hate, ignorance, and bigotry.

* I used to love doing puzzles, but it makes me cry to do puzzles since my stepdad's death, since he usually helped me when I was at the point of giving up. It occurs to me that this is probably a metaphor in some way, shape, or form.

* Ketchup, even just the smell of it, makes me sick to my stomach.

* I think James Joyce is the most overrated author of all time.

* My black lab is so gentle that I'd trust her alone with a baby, yet at the same time I suspect that anyone breaking into my house or something would be in for a rude awakening.

* Even though I tend to lean left politically, I'd rather watch Fox News Channel than CNN or MSNBC. This in large part the entertainment factor rather than getting the news. I follow AP news releases for actual information.

* I LOVE maple sugar candy. And Zagnut bars : )

* My dad should be on "Jeopardy" because he is, as my sister puts it, a fountain of useless information.

* Writing is an imperative part of my life. So is reading. To quote Harper Lee, "Until I feared I would lose it, I never loved to read. One does not love breathing."

* I am a cheeseburger aficionado. One word: Fuddrucker's.

* I was extremely resistant to reading the Twilight series (and the Harry Potter books until the fourth one came out). I don't know why, really, except for a minor hang-up with cheap commercialism. I got over it : )

* I am so stupid mathematically that I can't play cribbage (too much fast addition).

* I had my IQ tested twice as a child (they thought I was retarded ... go figure lol), had scores within two points of each other, then took an internet IQ test a few years ago and scored the number in between. (I'm hoping you think I'm being modest by not posting numbers here :-) ).

* I rewrote "Hamlet" as a novel for a final project in my college Shakespeare class ... the night before it was due. Yes, I finished. Yes, I got an A. No, my blood pressure has not recovered : )

* I have lost several cell phones because I put them on top of my car and drove off.

* I used to dream about spending the night in the public library.

* My younger daughter is very blonde, and people who see her with me and my (also very dark-haired) husband often feel the need to comment on it. I make a lot of mailman jokes.

* I am really OCD about even numbers. Like, at the gas station, the numbers have to end even or I'll keep putting gas in until it does.

* My daughters both look just like my mother did when she was little and quite a bit like I did when I was little, but I don't look a thing like my mother.

* I HATE feet (especially toenails).

* I could (and have) sit at the beach and watch the ocean for entire days.

* I love smoked Gouda cheese.

* I don't like being touched under my chin.

* I suffer (and I do mean suffer) from chronic pancreatitis.

* Vanilla Ice is on my iPod, and I'm not ashamed to admit it.

* I have an obsession with Charles Manson (the psychological aspects of his mind control thing, not in an at all admirable way).

* I think peanut butter pancakes are the best breakfast food in the world.

* One of my daughters thinks I know everything, one of my daughters thinks I know nothing.

* I cannot tell a linear story (in other words, settle down for a spell once I start talking because the ADHD will kick in and I'll add in numerous details and side tales that are not remotely relevant)

Yay : ) That was kind of fun!