Studying Abroad: A Parent's Dream ... A Parent's Nightmare

My brilliant and beautiful daughter, Emily, decided to spend the second semester of her sophomore year studying abroad in France.  She is currently on her way home (most recent text was "Wow Heathrow sucks"), and I cannot wait to see her.

Yeah, she's kind of amazing ...

One of her majors (yeah, she's one of those) requires a semester abroad, and since her other major is French, it was only logical for her to go to France.  She has been in Aix-en-Provence since the end of January.

She has also traveled extensively while there, from Krakow to Dublin, from Prague to Paris, and many other places as well.  She has gained an education through the culture and historical sites that I'm sure mattered far more to her than her university classes (Jeff was psyched when she posted a pic of Camus' headstone since it meant she knew who Camus was).

She went to Auschwitz, and it hit her very hard.  I mean, you can read about the Holocaust, but to actually see where these terrible and evil things took place ... shiver.

She's had some of your standard adventures.

For example, she got sick and didn't know how to handle it (she has pretty significant asthma).  I told her there must be doctors in France, but she was just overwhelmed about the process. She figured it out eventually, though.  She sent me this pic and said, "One is an antibiotic and one is an inhaler, but that's ALL I know."

There was some drama with the prepaid credit card her father sent.  And/or her bank card working.  She was having card issues, and it's very hard to help when you're so far away.

Then there's the stuff that you don't really want to know.

The text that says, "So I just swam topless in the Mediterranean."  A disturbing lack of specifics regarding the handsome young man that is in many of her Facebook pics.  The fact that she stayed in a hostel and had bizarre encounters there with a middle-aged man named Peaches.

The fact that alcohol unquestionably fueled much of her time ...

When she sent pics like this, I missed her so much that I cried (evidently peanut butter is a rare commodity in France)

So the bottom line is that Emily had an experience that she will remember for the rest of her life.  I do not know many details, although I cannot wait to spend time Monday hearing stories, looking at pictures, and hugging her a lot.

I am aware, very well aware, that there are some stories I will not hear.  I'm okay with that.  You don't go to a different country as a beautiful 19-year-old and not have some stories.

You know the funny thing?  I think Em and I have gotten closer while she was so far away (and we were pretty close to begin with).

She had a few rough moments that necessitated hourlong text sessions that happened in the middle of the night here, when I was awake nursing Gabby. We would both text if we saw something of interest to each other. We got to FaceTime a bit (but I hate FaceTime because I hate my face, so it was minimal).

Bottom line? This was an amazing experience for Emily, and a humbling one for me as I realize that my little baby girl is really and truly grown up.  She can navigate foreign countries ... does that mean that I can nag her for leaving half-empty cups all over the house?

If you are reading this, Cookie (and I know you usually do), please don't tell me the things I don't need to know (I'm pretty sure they can't be worse than what my imagination has created), but please know that I am so looking forward to hearing about your adventures.

Oh, and it's true that absence makes the heart grow fonder.  

Insomnia Advice: Bring it On :-)

I have been suffering from insomnia since I was a very young child.  I think much of the reason that I learned how to read before I was three is that my parents told me I had to stay in bed, even if I couldn't sleep, and ... well, there's only so  much you can do.

As you can imagine, I've heard every trick in the book.  Most of them are legal ...

I can honestly say that I have tried to battle my insomnia (which, if you are my Facebook friend, you are all too familiar with since I have a tendency to start ranting on FB when I can't sleep, which is with an unfortunate frequency).

But I've pretty much come to terms with it, all joking aside.  I've had a sleep study done (I learned that I have "ideopathic" issues falling asleep and staying asleep once I get there ... it was very useful ;-)), I developed good "sleep hygiene" (which is basically having a set routine and using relaxation techniques and such), and I have a prescription for Ambien that I use only when I am on the verge of going completely bananas from lack of sleep.

I have tried virtually everything to deal with my sleeping issues with the exception of hypnosis.  I am honestly pretty scared of hypnosis, because in addition to having horrible insomnia, I have horrible nightmares most of the time when I do sleep.  These nightmares are in general based around one of those traumatic life events that scar you forever, and I have dealt with it as much as I am going to.

I even hesitate to use Ambien overmuch because I get trapped in my nightmares sometimes, and I can't even wake up.  It's like being in a Nightmare on Elm Street  movie ;-)

But seriously, I am hoping that you will share your experiences with (and advice pertaining to) insomnia here.

I am compiling a list of things that I have tried and/or had recommended.  I have bolded what has worked for me on some level.

*  Melatonin
*  Ambien
*  Marijuana
*  Nyquil
*  Ginger root
*  Warm milk
*  Honeycomb
*  Reading
*  Watching television
*  Eliminating caffeine
*  Relaxation techniques (for awhile, counting backwards from 100 while actually visualizing each number worked)
*  Sex
*  Exercise
*  Intentionally staying up all night to "get caught up"
*  Advil PM
*  Music
*  Changing pillow positions/beds/and so on
*  Sleeping in a dark room
*  Muscle relaxants (Valium, Flexeril)
*  Sleeping in a bright room
*  Alcohol
*  Getting punished for bugging my parents in the middle of the night when I was a little kid
*  Warm bath

So, yeah, I think that's pretty much the gamut, other than the hypnosis thing, which I am not prepared to tackle.  I don't know that I ever will be, truth be told.

Do you have any advice (or encouragement) for struggling insomniacs out there?  Share in the comments :-)

Musings ...

Barq's root beer has been a constant. Pill bottles. Empty bottles of 151 smashed on the side of the road. Laughing. Milk chocolate melts in your mouth, not in your hand. "You are my mistress". "Come burn with us". "It's not rape when you ask for it". There is no "I" in team. THAT drama again? Full-sleeve. Eight ball. $2400. Ghettofantastic. Quarter pounder with cheese at 1:30 a.m. The American with George Clooney SUCKED. Own the road. Empty promises. I love the way you lie. 211. Descendant from Ireland married a slave. Secretary. Pumpkin ale. Negative numbers. The Scarlet Letter. "You're cute". That was fucking amazing. Two seater sports car at the beach. To change a tire. Your car's safe for the road, but about to blow up. Good friends pulling through--especially PH, JG, ST-S, SW, AB, DS, and SH, who are always there when I need them. BK and BB are sometime there when I need them--on their terms, of course. PL is gone, and I really miss him sometimes. Crown Royale. Driving the old lady mobile. DROID.

License to Throttle the DMV

So I got a letter from the state DMV yesterday informing me that I have six points on my license and that a "driver improvement" class is recommended. Oh, and should I get any further points on my license, I will lose it for a year.

Now, I'm the person that tells students that breaking the dress code just because so-and-so got away with wearing a skirt more than four inches above the knee does not make it right. I believe in rules and, when necessary, I believe in consequences. That's why I'm not going to belabor the point that three of the points are from speeding tickets dating back to 2003, when I was commuting over three hours a day (sometimes the law of averages are just not on your side) and the other three came all at once for my allegedly passing a school bus (which in retrospect I should have fought in court since I DID NOT PASS A SCHOOL BUS, but it happened right around the time that everything was blowing up with the ex-husband, and it seemed easier to just pay the $100 fine).

Nope, my point is a bit simpler. The aforementioned ex-husband, who drove drunk and recklessly for months and received two DWIs within a couple of weeks, is slated to get his license back in August (that's a year after losing it, ladies and gentlemen) because--drum roll--he took a driver improvement program. The reason for this is actually what I'm further annoyed by. Basically, he received the second DWI before his court date for the first one, so technically it's only considered one offense.

I take full responsibility for my speeding tickets. I sped. I did. Penalize me, by all means. And penalize me if you must for not being in a position to fight the stupid school bus thing (I'm a teacher--I would not and did not pass the freaking school bus). But how DARE you imply that going 78 in a 65 MPH zone is remotely comparable to aggravated drunk driving?

So let me get this straight--three minor offenses (we're talking 78 MPH on a 65 MPH highway) nearly seven years ago, and I'm set to lose my license for the same amount of time as a serial drunk driver? Am I the only one confused by this?